Keira-anne.com

PLEASE, SIR…I WANT SOME MORE

Sexual fetishism is the sexual attraction for material and terrestrial objects while in reality the essence of the object is inanimate and sexless. Body parts may also be subject to sexual fetishes (also known as partialism) in which the preferred body part for the fetishist takes a sexual precedent over the owner. Sexual Fetishism may be regarded as a disorder of sexual preference, or as an enhancing element to a relationship.

Extract provided by Wikipedia

It wasn’t until I was 18-years-old that I had my first relationship that was in any way physical. Up until then, kissing was as far as I went. To me, this was new and exciting and completely exhilarating. Sex and sexuality were very foreign concepts to my young, innocent and uncorrupted mind.

One afternoon, while my then-boyfriend and I had his house to ourselves, we found ourselves in his bedroom in the middle of a hot n’ heavy make-out session. There was nothing out of the ordinary about the scenario. We were mid-kiss when I suddenly felt the sharp smack of his hand making direct contact with my bottom. I think it took me 1.6 seconds to scramble off and shout at him “what the hell are you doing?”

I don’t remember his exact response, but I’m sure that it was a combination of an uncomfortable laugh and a mumbled apology before going in for another kiss. I shrugged it off as though he was simply being silly and forgot about it within a minute or two.

It was only minutes later that it happened again. I was so shocked and so confused. I had no idea what he was doing or what his intention was. All I could conclude was that my boyfriend must just be weird. How was I to know that some men (and women, for that matter) had a very particular interest in spanking?

Photo courtesy of hapgoodbaines on Flickr

If you search for the word “fetish” on Google, you’ll be presented with approximately 105,000,000 hits within less time than it took me to haul ass off the boyfriend’s lap so many years ago. The range of different types of fetishes is perhaps as comprehensive as the number of hits itself. Anything from body parts, activities, and yes, even shoes, are fair game.

It wasn’t so long ago that the theory behind a fetish was based in somewhat of a traumatic or imprinting circumstance in one’s past. However, that thinking has evolved with sexuality and fetishes are viewed as a normal and healthy part of one’s randy realm. It’s not to say that this is true for everyone, as the sexual experience is an experience that is entirely unique from one person to the next.

My virginal spanking was nearly a decade ago and I am, in fact, a changed woman. In all honesty, a little tap on the ass (pun very much intended) can add a little bit of excitement to the bedroom routine. I can’t say that it’s something I don’t enjoy because I do. Beyond that much, I think fetishes are still very much a learning process for me. I haven’t discovered any other avenues in which I’d consider to be fetishes, and maybe this is as far as it will ever go for me. The beauty in it is that perhaps it’s something that we grow into, something in which different partners or people are able to pick apart pieces of our sexuality and uncover something even unbeknownst to ourselves.

Is there anyone reading this who is daring enough to share their fetish with the class? I can understand that perhaps a fetish isn’t something that is a part of everyone’s sexuality and that’s also completely okay. So where do you stand? Do you let the inner kink out or are you still finding your way?

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DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL

I believe that I am a magnet - a magnet for infidelity, that is.

1. When I was 18, I dated a young man who seemed somewhat enamoured with me. This was short-lived, however, as he started dating a girl who was much, much younger than me very soon after we broke up. I’d have to be a complete idiot to think they weren’t already fooling around before we broke up. The grapevine likes to gossip.

2. A couple years later, I dated a man who was a fair bit older than me but, for some reason, could only have dinner or see movies late in the evening. By late, I mean after 10:00 p.m. That didn’t take long to fall apart, and it wasn’t long before I found out he was nearly engaged.

3. The last person I dated for a lengthy time was a relationship that ended over two years ago, but his arrogance still seethes me. His phone was always ringing at 2:00 a.m., he was aloof about his goings-on and certainly wasn’t always reachable.

What is most appalling about all of these instances is that I turned a blind eye to what was happening. Sure, I knew deep down that things certainly weren’t kosher, but did I speak up about it? Nope, sure didn’t.

Photo courtesy of rumorebianco on Flickr

Cheating is certainly not a new trend. Men and women have cheated within relationships for as long as they’ve been walking the Earth. What I don’t understand is the “why.”

In any of my relationships in which the men I was with were unfaithful to me, not “putting out” on my part was never an issue, so I can’t chalk it up to that. However, a repeated pattern in any regard should be a red flag. In something I recently watched (though the name of it escapes me at the moment), the female lead was complaining about her lack of luck in relationships to a male friend of hers. She lamented that she must be picking the wrong men. “Not so,” he replied. “The one thing all these men have in common is you.” Ouch.

Before we can really chew on this and discuss why it is people cheat, what is considered cheating within a relationship? Wikipedia defines cheating within personal relationships as:

With regard to human relationships, couples tend to expect sexual monogamy of each other. If so, then cheating commonly refers to forms of infidelity, particularly adultery. However, there are other divisions of infidelity, which may be emotional. Cheating by thinking of, touching and talking with the other sex may equally be as damaging to one of the parties. Emotional cheating may be correlated to that of emotional abuse, which to date is treated as seriously in a court of law as physical cheating. With the expansion of understanding of other cultures, there is a wide spectrum of what cheating means. When in a committed relationship, the definition of cheating is based on both parties opinions and both parties may redefine their understanding to match the party at an either lower or higher extreme of this definition. Some couples simply believe that cheating constitutes doing anything, whether verbal or physical, that one would not do in front of their significant other. Such examples would include: Kissing, Making out, and Sexual Relations.

Many people consider cheating to be any violation of the mutually agreed-upon rules or boundaries of a relationship, which may or may not include sexual monogamy. For example, in some polyamorous relationships, the concepts of commitment and fidelity do not necessarily hinge on complete sexual or emotional monogamy. Whether polyamorous or monogamous, the boundaries to which people agree vary widely, and sometimes these boundaries evolve within each relationship.

Do you agree? Disagree? What’s considered cheating in your eyes? Sex? Oral sex? Kissing? There are a million different answers here, so let’s hear some of yours.

In my own opinion, I believe that the aforementioned “emotional cheating” is just as damaging and hurtful as physical cheating, if not moreso. I’ve long believed that people cheat for reasons that are mostly anything but physical - I think that it ultimately leads back to having needs met. Surely those that do seek the arms of another can state that it’s all about the sex because they don’t want to have sex with their partner. However, I believe that if one’s needs are being met, all around, that the cheating wouldn’t take happen in the first place.

If your partner was making time for you, listening to you, loving on you and respecting you, and this was a mutual meeting of the needs, would you not want to spend time in your partner’s bed rather than that of a stranger? Of course there are going to be circumstances, such as those who are, among other things, addicted to sex or lack any sense of moral responsibility, who could cheat even despite having all needs at home met.

Why do you think men and women cheat? Is it purely physical or the result of something deeper that’s unsettling?

For this girl, I’m a one-man woman. I have no desire to share my man with another, whether I know of it or not. I believe that karma’s a bitch (even though I don’t quite believe in karma), and for me, cheating’s never okay. I suppose you could say that my experiences have left me, to a certain extent, somewhat jaded, paranoid and cynical. I’d like to still believe that there are men out there who are one-woman gentlemen.

Do you tolerate it?

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LOOK BUT DON’T TOUCH

As a young girl, Lady Luck was always on my side - at least when it came to winning things. I entered contests left and right and accumulated a pretty little collection of prizes. Nothing, however, was ever as embarrassing to receive in the mail as my Coneheads prize pack, complete with conehead skull cap.

Two years ago, as I wandered through the Bay in downtown Vancouver, I quite literally bumped into a ballot box. The winner received a sitting with the Bay’s in-house photographer and one 5″x7″ print. “Sounds like fun!” I thought to myself as I scribbled down my info on a scrap of paper and stuffed it in. Before I knew it, I received a call informing me that I’d won.

Now, I’m no idiot - I knew it was a promotional thing but I thought the opportunity to have my photo taken would be an exciting one because, as we all know, I enjoy taking photos of myself. And, quite obviously, I’m not the only one.

I arrived at the studio at the appointed time one evening the following week, oddly not excited at all. I thought that I could snag a few portrait photos for my mom and be done with it. I didn’t even dress in anything exciting. When I got there, I realized that it was an actual professional photography studio. As the main man himself, Kevin James Day, was too costly to sit with, one of his associates was to take my portraits. She got to work in one of the studio rooms, but Mr. Day sauntered in after about 20 minutes and said to his associate “on second thought, I’ll take her photos.”

A few more minutes passed, a few more portraits snapped. I engaged in a bit of conversation with the man with the camera and began inquiring about his photography background. I knew what I wanted to ask, but I wasn’t sure I could.

“So…umm…” I stalled. “Do you…do artistic nude photography too?”

“Yup, I take all kinds of photos.”

I was shaking a bit and a tad nervous but I came out with it: “Can I take some artistic nudes instead of these portraits then?” What was I thinking?!

“Sure - these photos can be whatever you want them to be.”

You wouldn’t believe how quickly I whipped off everything but my jeans.

Photo © Kevin James Day

What was to be a half-hour portrait session turned into two and a half hours of me parading around the brick and hardwood studio in not a whole lot of clothing. There was something incredibly freeing about the entire experience - to say that it was liberating would be cliché, but it couldn’t be more true.

Looking back on that experience, it still surprises me. I have long been comfortable with my body and within my own skin. A week later, as the photographer and I flipped through all my proofs, he exclaimed “it’s amazing how you just did what you did…most of my clients book a session like that three months in advance and haul ass at the gym until that time.” Now on my bookshelf sits a little leather-bound book that will always remind me of my day of liberation - a book that few have seen.

Perhaps it was a combination of factors, or perhaps it was the simple fact that the studio with the 15-foot ceilings came complete with 15-foot windows. Because you see, I have long been somewhat of an exhibitionist. My thought regarding nudity is “why not?” There’s nothing shameful or embarrassing about our skin or about our bodies.

We all have “flaws.”

Exhibitionism runs much more densely than just padding around one’s apartment in the buff. There’s everything from the thrill of open windows to topless sunbathing (which, yes mom, I used to do in our backyard - thanks for the warning that the BBQ repairman was coming over that one particular afternoon) to the hopes of getting caught having sex in public.

My one personal - and somewhat weird - disclaimer? If I think that you think I’m hideous, I cover up and hide and turn all the lights off. I become the complete antithesis of how I really feel about being nude.

And the flipside? There are always those who like to watch (known as voyeurs). I can’t much comment on that because it’s not the side of the coin I prescribe to but I’m sure there are many reading this that do.

Today’s question to you all: do you like to watch or to be watched?

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TO GROOM OR NOT TO GROOM?

That really is an interesting question.

When I was 18-years-old, I dated a young man who you could say paid careful attention to the small details - at least when it came to himself and his appearance. It wasn’t until after we stopped dating that I learned of the somewhat hideous details of his “beauty routine.” This included the fact that he filed and painted his nails with clear polish to keep them looking refined.

A few years later, I dated another compulsive groomer. However, this time around it was somewhat of a Catch-22. You see, from his father he inherited a modest amount of chest, upper back and upper arm hair. I was glad to see that he waxed to remove the back and appendage fur, but doing so in turn left a bumpy, red rash for a few days afterwards. Neither was favourable to me.

Photo courtesy of Buddy Stone on Flickr

It’s 2007 and the “beauty” world now caters to men in nearly every single facet of sprucing things up, physically speaking. There’s the sports pedicure, the aforementioned waxing, scents designed to keep women pawing all over you, almost as many hair products as women need and use as well as actual spas created solely for the everyday chap.

I’ve long been called a blatant liar in sharing my grooming preferences when it comes to the opposite sex. I love men that are men…ones that smell natural instead of saturated in cologne. Ones that aren’t afraid of a little chest hair instead of ripping it off with hot strips of wax (I said chest hair, not unibrows). Pretty boys are not for me, nor have they ever been.

And you know what else? I actually enjoy a little bit of a tummy on my men (but you already knew that, didn’t you?)

There is, however, one line that cannot be crossed; one area that simply cannot be neglected. All bets are off when headed south. Trimming is absolutely, posivitely and completely essential. Note that I said trimming, not shaving off completely. No one wants to see two bare Easter eggs down there either.

Question No. 1: How do you like your men groomed? Or alternatively, if you’re a man, how far is too far in terms of taking care of your appearance?

Women, you may not be excused from today’s lesson.

Can I be frank while still being Keira-Anne? Of course I can.

I am a hair-o-phobe. I have a huge aversion to female body hair, particularly my own. I even go so far as using depilatory cream on the peach fuzz on my arms. My legs are shaved on a daily basis and let’s face it…hardwood floors are just so much easier to maintain than carpet. (Isn’t it written somewhere that “A Cosmo girl is always ready?”) Enough said.

Photo courtesy of DimsumDarren on Flickr

However, don’t get me wrong. I completely stand by the idea of each to their own. I’d never shun a woman and look at her in disgust for letting the Amazon jungle grow wild - it’s just most certainly not for me.

Question No. 2: How do you like your women groomed? Or alternatively, if you’re a woman, how far is too far in terms of taking care of your appearance?

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JUICY FRUIT

When I was in my very early teens, or perhaps even 12 years old, I was flipping through Rolling Stone as I did so religiously at that age. In one particular issue I saw a picture of Sonic Youth’s Kim Gordon wearing a t-shirt blazoned with a very famous logo and the phrase ‘Eat Me.’

“Mom, I want that shirt! It’s so cool…” I proclaimed. I flipped over the picture to show her. Immediately she scoffed, raised her eyebrows disapprovingly as mothers do and firmly said “I don’t think so.”

I was completely confused but didn’t push the issue.

I sincerely hope that, as you read my little anecdote, you’re clearly able to see which magical land we’re travelling to tonight.

Photo courtesy of fire pretty on Flickr

How about instead of tip-toeing around tonight’s subject, let’s go balls out, okay? Tonight, Wanton Wednesday encourages you to open your mouth and talk about opening your mouth: oral sex.

I struggled all day with pinning down a topic for today and finally decided to settle on this one when, after last week’s post, someone said WW just needs to be a bit racier. And quite frankly, this is one of the hottest topics I could think of that most of you may have a thing or two to say about. However, even as I write this, I have absolutely no clue where I’m going with it.

Who can say that the subject of “giving brain” or “muff diving” hasn’t come up among your group of friends? It’s the subject that never ends and never finds any sort of resolution. Everyone has a different opinion of it, a different stance (not to mention different techniques).

Truth be told, as I’m sure I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I don’t think I even truly knew what oral sex was until I hit high school. In fact, years ago when I taught sex ed to high school-aged girls, one even innocently asked me if oral sex was what’s known as “talking dirty.” Sweet, hey? And though it’s possible (and probable) that you’ll talk about it with your friends until you’re all blue in the face, there’s no lesson like a lips-on lesson.

That being said, there’s no way to know if it’s for you until you try. Mom, cover your eyes because in the spirit of honesty, I’ll go right out and say that it’s one aspect of sex that I enjoy greatly. Though I will say that it was something that needed to grow on me.

One tip I can offer you: Breathe through your nose. Breathing through your mouth is, quite literally, impossible when obstructed. That logic didn’t come to me instantly.

I realize that it’s certainly not for everyone, and as Samantha Jones so eloquently put it, “they don’t call it a job for nothing.” I am quite sure that sentiment goes two ways.

It’s getting late and I really don’t want to start rambling, so here’s my straight-up question to you (as your humble narrator was so honest and open with you, oh my readers): where do you stand on “giving lip” or “rolling cigars”? I think in any healthy relationship, it’s a very welcome addition to the mix.

* In commenting, please be aware that comment moderation is strictly enforced. All IP addresses are recorded, and any comments of a malicious, slandering, or otherwise inappropriate nature will be instantly deleted and the user blocked. Everyone on here should feel free to discuss, debate, ask and share in a safe manner. Let’s keep this SFO (Safe For the Office) *

V FOR VIRGINITY

Popping the cherry, deflowering, giving up the goods, giving up the pit and expired V-card are all slang for one thing: losing one’s virginity.

Photo courtesy of ChinchillaVilla on Flickr

Virginity is quite possibly the touchiest (pun very much intended) and most personal facet of sex and all things associated. Some people lose it by choice, some keep it despite their choice, while others are robbed of it and even more, some aren’t even sure if they still have it.

12 years ago, a 22-year-old intern working for the Clinton Administration in the U.S. White House was the match that ignited a nation-wide debate on what constitutes as virginity.

Touching, orgasm, penetration? And if penetration is the turning point at which one’s cherry is popped, does it matter which nook or cranny is infiltrated by Battlepants Galactica?

Question No. 1 for tonight’s debate: in your opinion, which activity do you consider to be the proverbial “point of no return?”

And while we’re on the subject, let’s consider an appropriate age for stepping out onto the lusty ledge.

I remember in sixth grade, as I sat in my desk one afternoon, the conversation of two boys behind me caught my attention. “Yeah, after school, me and Katie (*name changed) are gonna get a condom and have sex!”

I was mortified. Whether or not that boy’s after-school activities ever panned out as planned is besides the point, but the fact that it was on the agenda is cause enough for concern. Keep in mind that this was close to two decades ago.

I’m sure that, were all of you to post a comment informing the readers of that magical number at which you lost your virginity, we’d have a wide range of ages.

Growing up, and even well into my teens, I was of the “romantic” notion that it would be best and greatest to wait until I was married, and actually give my husband my virginity of my wedding night. Laugh stifling aside, suffice to say that never happened and I have zero regrets.

To wait or not to wait is cause for great debate between families and religious factions alike. Being involved with the Christian church when I was younger, I was taught that waiting was what was “best for me,” but that wasn’t the reality I saw. Though sex isn’t something I believe should be thrown around with whoever and whenever, and should be treated with somewhat of a sense of fragility, it’s not something to be placed on a pedestal either.

At the end of the day, all mental, emotional and expectational connotations aside, sex is very much simply a physical act (in your humble narrator’s opinion).

Which leads me to question no. 2 for tonight’s debate: at which age do you feel it’s appropriate to give up the goods?

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C U NEXT TUESDAY (or Wednesday, in this case)

You use it every single day. It opens; it closes. You can put things in it or spit them back out. Sometimes it’s loud and sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it’s entirely unpredictable and works before you tell it to. One thing your mouth is good for is talk. And in particular, dirty talk.

There are two facets of lewd language I want to touch down on today. The most obvious of the two would be vocal carnal exchanges between lovers, and the less obvious being the so-called coarse language in day-to-day conversation. But let’s talk about them in reverse, okay?

* Before I go any further, keep in mind that any and all words that you may find unsettling in this post are simply for exemplary purposes and are not meant to offend.*

They’re words that come up in passing each and every day, whether from your own mouth or the mouths of those around you. In the office, on the street corner, in the record store and most certainly on the television. We call people dicks, tell others to screw off, some people just plain “suck,” and there others we see walking down the street we deem to be “creamalicious.”

How is it that sexual implications have become so interlaced with the way we speak to people or address them? And keep in mind that the examples above are simply the tip of the…iceberg - but I don’t think I need to shed the spotlight on anything more than just that. Who’s to say what is deemed as apropos and what crosses the line?

As an adolescent, I’d forever be chastized for rolling my eyes, groaning and saying “oh maaaaan, that sucks!” My father told me it wasn’t appropriate and that I wasn’t allowed to say that when I didn’t like something. Little did 13-year-old me know the origins of that lament.

How do you feel about the melding of sex and slang?

Okay, we’re a little warmed up so how about slipping under the sheets with me? In fact, how about talking dirty to me? Metaphorically speaking, of course.

Photo courtesy of old scotch on Flickr
It’s an interesting concept that I find people are very staunchly divided on. Many of us were raised in a time wedged between the so-called “Summer of Love” in 1967 where people came together in the name of love (and lust), and a generation of open-minded people in the 1990s. For most of you and those you know, even saying the s-word was frowned upon because “ladies don’t say those things.” Er, men too I suppose.So how much more difficult is it to tell your partner in passion that what he or she is doing is juuuust right? Excrutiating, I’m sure.

I consider myself lucky in that sex and sexuality have always been something I’ve felt comfortable discussing and talking about, not to mention elaborating on in the adjective sense. Perhaps that’s why I’ve begun this weekly series on all things s-e-x. Quite a few of my friends are just as free in discussing things of a nympho nature. However, just as many tend to shy away from the topic and especially words that even come close to describing anything to do with everyone’s favourite after-hours activity.

Is it hot? Is it not? Is talking dirty something that turns you on or grosses you out? Or further, does it completely wig you out? Have your say in the comments and let’s get this ball rolling.

* In commenting, please be aware that comment moderation is strictly enforced. All IP addresses are recorded, and any comments of a malicious, slandering, or otherwise inappropriate nature will be instantly deleted and the user blocked. Everyone on here should feel free to discuss, debate, ask and share in a safe manner. Let’s keep this SFO (Safe For the Office) *

I’M JUST A GIRL IN A SEXUALLY SATURATED WORLD

There’s a scene in the movie Flashdance in which Jennifer Beals’ character reaches up and releases a glittery splash of water all over herself during her moonlighting dance routine. As a young girl, I would watch this scene over and over again, enamoured by how completely fabulous this made her seem. Once I grew tired of the same old routine, my next fascination was with Francis “Baby” Houseman in Dirty Dancing. Her story of being swept off her feet in every sense made my heart melt every single time I watched Johnny tell Mr. Houseman that “nobody puts Baby in the corner.”

I bet you swooned just a little bit even just reading that. I did.

As a young girl, I lived in an idyllic bubble where women didn’t have to have fantastic breasts and flawless skin to be beautiful. I was ignorant to what the world thought was true beauty and only saw what I thought was beautiful. I was unaware of the reality and power of sex and sexuality. Ignorance is bliss.

Today we live in a sexually-saturated world where children know much, much more than I ever did at such a young age. To be quite honest, I don’t think I really even knew what oral sex was until my senior year in high school. I don’t think I’d be far off to presume that that’s no longer the case. And to top that off, ridiculously unrealistic “ideals” of beauty are pressed on such impressionable minds, so much so that it makes me wonder how the hell today’s generation are going to turn out once they reach adulthood.

Little girls and boys grow up to become men and women, and that means we all of a sudden become secure in our sexuality, right? I would say that’s mostly wrong.

I once heard a line in a movie that said “the bad stuff is easier to believe.” I think there’s a lot of truth to that for most of us because we’ve been conditioned not only that it’s egotistical to think highly of ourselves, but that we must be constantly measuring ourselves up against others that are presented as “prettier or perkier or more muscular.” Men are not immune. Disillusions about attractiveness and sexuality create a whole landslide of negative effects for both sexes.

I know from personal experience that prescribing to these ideals can cause a lot of insecurity, self-doubt, questioning and the desperate need to be validated as beautiful by others. “It’s not enough for me to think that I’m gorgeous – you have to too!” And if you didn’t think I was gorgeous, then I wasn’t. It was as simple as that. Further, how many men and women go on to have reckless sexual experiences in an attempt at self-validation? These are very dangerous and unhealthy behaviours, but is reaching this point no longer avoidable?

Sadly, I think that levels of sexual saturation in TV, radio, music, magazines and even expectations of others are only going to continue to increase. So what does this mean for your future brood and their healthy view of sexuality? What are you going to tell your daughter to help her understand that she’s ridiculously beautiful even if she doesn’t have curves like Gisele Bundchen? How are you going to help your son realize that being a real man is not about looking like David Beckham?

Parenting just got a whole lot tougher.

* In commenting, please be aware that comment moderation is strictly enforced. All IP addresses are recorded, and any comments of a malicious, slandering, or otherwise inappropriate nature will be instantly deleted and the user blocked. Everyone on here should feel free to discuss, debate, ask and share in a safe manner. Let’s keep this SFO (Safe For the Office) *

A couple of weeks ago, my friend Sonny handed me an incredible opportunity. Hanson was scheduled to play a small gig in Los Angeles, and to coincide with the show, their publicists were interested in conducting an online e-mail interview to promote the show. Knowing the huge Hanson fan that I am, Sonny asked me if I wanted to formulate the interview questions and complete the intro write-up. How could a girl like me refuse?

Photo courtesy of mferrin on FlickrIf you’re curious to check out the interview (and you should be!), head on over to the LAist to hear what Taylor (yah, the bone-alicious one) had to say in response to my questions.

Me: “I am totally drawing a blank - I don’t know what to blog about.“

Friend: “Write about sex, duh.“

Me: “I considered that. I just need to narrow the scope.“

Friend: “Talk about lesbian tendencies.“

Me: “Ugh. I have none.“

Friend: “Perfect!“

But it’s an excellent topic of choice. However, that conversation was a few hours ago and I have yet to narrow my scope, so I’m not going to. Sex is a topic I’ve always been comfortable with and have actually enjoyed discussing. Sexual politics and human sexuality are driving forces behind so much of everything in our lives yet it’s something that so many people shy away from opening their mouths about (pun intended).

That being said, I’ve got a thought. Why not a whole series on coitus and consumation and the many facets of fornication? Let’s call it “Wanton Wednesdays,” shall we? There’s no time like the present to begin, so hang on to your knickers because here we go…

Week 1: TALK AIN’T CHEAP, HONEY

Has this post already made you uncomfortable? I’m willing to bet that at least 50% of you are vexed by the picture I’ve posted below simply because of the connotations it could make. Our attitude towards sex and sexuality is conditioned from a time that goes back further than each of us can recall in our own lives. Sometimes it’s based in a strict upbringing or the result of religious influence and for some, the idea of sexuality is one that doesn’t cause a single eyelash to bat. I consider myself lucky in that sex was never a taboo topic in my parents’ household, all the while I most certainly had friends who’d gasp in a mix of shock and horror at the very mention of that three-letter word.

Photo courtesy of Opal in the rough on Flickr
Why is it that you’re squirming in your seat? In terms of sexuality, I think that open discussion and education are your two wisest weapons. Opening up your mind to something that is a very tangible reality of life and being smart about it really should not be overlooked. And don’t mistake me here…I am not simply talking about intercourse; I’m referring to, but not limited to, our attitudes, views on sex, views of ourselves, our individual sexuality (because I hate to break it to you, but yup, you’re a sexual being), sex in the media, our bodies, our perceptions and our ideals. Truth be told, I could probably blog about a different aspect of sex every single Wednesday for the rest of my blogging “career” and never run out of things to talk about.

That being said, this is what Week 1 is all about. From here, I open it all up to you. If you’re uncomfortable with the topic, be frank and say so. If you’re open to discussion, share away. Feel free to comment on topics you’d like to see covered and I’ll open up the floor over the next few weeks, depending on the response to this. I think that if everyone has a little bit more understanding and a little bit more knowledge with which to equip themselves, each of us will be that much stronger. It’s essential to building a healthy view of yourself as a person, as a sexual person and as someone with a strong self-image. Sex is not a negative concept!

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