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Today is a very special day.

My lovable, sweet-as-pie, kind-as-candy and darling friend Ashley is celebrating her birthday.

Friends for nearly a decade, there aren’t a lot of adventures we haven’t been on. We’ve ridden roller coasters, drank wine stashed in thermoses in the park, soaked in the Banff hot springs in matching bikinis, eaten most likely litres of Island Farms ice cream, talked under the stars, clung to each other during horror films and consumed our combined weight in Cupcakes. Ashley has even been a motherly hand to hold at the dentist’s office when I got an abscess on vacation.

What I love most about my “sister” – besides our uncanny knack to dress alike without even planning on it – is her unconditional love. No matter how different our viewpoints or opinions or thoughts are, she’s always there to love and respect me. Ashley is one of the few people I can be my true self with because she does not judge.

This past Sunday was our third anniversary. Jordy and I have spent the last three months together, though it actually feels more like three years. I was forewarned of his potential issues, but my little Mango Monkey (he gets that nickname based on the way he smells after a bath) has done nothing short of constantly amaze me with his resiliency and ability to adapt.

The best part of it all is seeing his true personality start to shine now that he’s become truly comfortable with his “mommy”. Jordy loves to wake me up just moments before my alarm with a few kisses and some burrowing under my pillow. He truly loves to cuddle. Surprisingly, he does well with kids and is even gentle with sweet Sienna-bear. Jordy can’t get enough peanut butter and knows the Jif jar when I bring it out of the cupboard without a word. The little guy plays somethin’ fierce with his squeaky toys and shows no shame in farting around me – a lot.

Few people know this about him, but sadly, his first owner had him de-barked as a very young puppy. The sounds he made when he first came into my home were nothing above a whimper, but now he really tries to communicate with his voice and he’s built up quite a sound for himself. It’s my hope that he’ll learn to truly bark once again.

And lastly, if you’ve met Jordy, you know he’s an introverted dog. He’s not afraid of other dogs, but initially he never, ever interacted with them. We’ve been visiting dog parks several times a week and even found one that tends to be frequented by other pomeranians. Very cautiously he’s beginning to leave my side to go and interact, and I have no doubt he’ll be running and rolling on the grass with the rest of them in no time!

I can’t even begin to tell you how much joy he brings into my life on a daily basis and how lucky I feel to have found him. Check out Jordy’s set on Flickr for more pictures snapped last night at the park.

Sometimes it’s still strange to see my baby brother with a baby of his own…

“If you listen to the poets, they’ll tell you that a big, bad event in someone’s life changes them.
If you lose the woman you love or your legs,
You suddenly find a kind of beauty inside yourself.
That’s what they say – the poets.
The truth is, you don’t.
After a big, bad event, you only become more of the person you already were.” – Augustus Hill

I firmly believe that the most drastic changes in a person’s life can only be brought about by the kind of catalyst that shakes you to your core. The kind that flips your life upside-down, inside-out, busted into bits and smashed together again. The one that charges into your life like a t-bone car accident, smacking into you from left field and catching you unaware.

When what you thought you knew has been stripped away, all you’re left with is a choice to make.

You can stay down, bleed from your wounds and let infections fester. The only other choice is to stand up – no, jump up – and start limping. Soon the limp turns into a stride, and that stride turns into a jog. The jog becomes a sprint and one day you stop for a moment, turn around and see the remnants as only a microscopic dot on the darkening horizon.

Original Photo: tj.blackwell on Flickr

I have found a kind of beauty inside myself, but it’s a beauty that was always there. That beauty lies in unearthing more of the person I already was and finding a sense of tranquility in it all. When you are confronted with the reality that your life will no longer be what you thought it would be, you can start to imagine what else it can be… what else it should be.

Sometimes I feel as though I would resent anyone that would try to run awry with what I have going for me right now. To realize that about myself and my wants feels so incredible – like busting through chains that seem to enslave even the best of us.

Sure, some changes will kick you when you’re down. But if you can find it in yourself to kick back, you just might meet who you really are.

Now that is what the poets should say.

I thought that sitting down to write a Mother’s Day post would be incredibly easy, but what am I supposed to say that my mom doesn’t already know in her heart?

It’s been the biggest and most important job for the majority of her life. 28 and 25 years ago, my mother gave birth to myself and my brother, respectively. It was something more than apparent that she has always been destined for.

Photo: tempest_kat on Flickr

It’s not lost on me that there are countless people around the world who won’t celebrate today because their relationships with their mothers are all but existent. I have been so blessed with a mother who is gracious, kind, others-focused, loving, gentle, understanding, beautiful, generous, hard-working and always full of hope.

My mother is more than just my mom but my friend also. She is someone I look forward to spending time with, to talking with and to sharing with.

I don’t need one day in May to celebrate her because I love my mother every single day – something she knows all too well. There is, however, one thing I may not say as often as I should…

This Sunday will mark three weeks since I brought Jordy home to live with me. In that time, he has grown literal leaps and bounds, coming out of his shell and displaying a unique personality all of his own. For a dog that I expected to have so many behavioral issues, he continues to surprise and amaze me in how well he has seemingly adapted.

Change, however, isn’t always a forward motion I have learned. Sometimes that kind of progress is two steps forward, one step back.

We have our usual morning routine: we get up and go outside so he can pee, he eats, I shower and then we go for a 20-minute walk before I leave for work. Jordy has always done his “business” on our walk, much like clockwork, for the past two weeks.

This morning I got out of the shower to find that he had done his “business” in five different spots on the living room carpet and peed on the leg of the freshly-washed jeans I had laid out to wear today. I was totally disheartened and had one of those “what have I gotten myself into” mommyhood moments of self-doubt as I fought back tears. Who was I kidding? Raising a dog on my own?

When I was in negotiations to adopt a rescue dog, the group’s director cautioned that I’d have a few months of hard work ahead of me. I think perhaps I have been getting comfortable in our life together, forgetting that Jordy is one-half of the equation and maybe he hasn’t caught up to me. Three out of the last four nights this week, I have gone out after work. I had planned to again tonight, but this morning’s events were a huge wake-up call.

While I have adjusted to life with a dog, Jordy hasn’t adjusted to life with mommy in a new apartment in a new city with new toys and new food. His behavior hasn’t otherwise changed, and he’s still the same lovable ball of energy he’s been from day one. What I have realized, however, is that it’s me that needs to take a step back.

Henry David Thoreau said “things do not change, we change.” My life isn’t just about me anymore and I was shown that in a rather obvious way just an hour ago. All my experience with dogs in the past is meaningless in some regards because no two dogs are alike, and Jordy has specific needs that only I can meet.

I think the best thing I can do involves a little bit of self-sacrifice, meaning sacrificing my weekday social life in evenings for the next month or so. I can’t provide a routine that Jordy can get used to without some consistency. Maybe only then can we start to dip our toes and paws into different streams.

Please tell me Jordy and I are not alone in this.

I promise that this blog will not become dedicated solely to Jordy, but I’ve taken the week off work to spend time with him, so it’s really all I’ve got worth blogging about.

Jordy has been adjusting to his new life beautifully, with a full appetite, playful personality and affectionate demeanor. I’ve been working at training him in getting him into a routine of being left alone for periods of time during the day. Today he was alone for an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon; by the end of the week, he should be used to my work schedule.

With anything this major, there’s always that momentary thought of “oh man, what have I gotten myself into?” but I have fallen so madly and completely in love in only three days.

Jordy has lived in six other homes in less than three years. It’s hard to believe, looking at this guy, that no one would want him enough to keep him.

I’ve committed myself to loving him and to give him the best possible home – the home that he deserves – for the rest of his life. God-willing, we’ll be together until I’m into my 40s.

Now if you’ll excuse me, Jordy and I have some sunshine to frolic in (yes, I said “frolic“) before he gobbles up his dinner (and he really does gobble)!

“He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.
You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours,
faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.”
- Author Unknown

The times my family visited Vancouver when I was a little girl, I was constantly in awe. The buildings, the glass, the concrete, the sounds, the smells, the people. It was all so entirely different from my quiet life in the Comox Valley and constantly offered endless excitement.

When I finally moved to downtown Vancouver just shy of five years ago, I was completely stoked! Everything I’d wanted since I was a little girl was finally mine, and it felt like an adventure had started. After two years, however, something changed. I started to feel resentment and annoyance at a City so seemingly drowning within itself. I wanted desperately to move, and once again started dreaming of a life back in the Comox Valley.

It seems that the tides have turned once again. Between a new apartment that I love so much I could eat it up with a spoon, a great job that I actually (for the most part) enjoy and one fantastic, loving, cuddlebug of a monkey coming to live with me in his forever home in just two more sleeps, I am falling in love again.

In truth, I have so many fantastic memories and opportunities that have been cultivated on Vancouver’s streets and beaches. The friends that have come into my life constantly amaze me. I have a new peace about my situation, about where I’m at and, most importantly, where I’m supposed to be. And right now, that place is absolutely right where I am.

In honour of my revived love affair, a photo essay of some of my favourite places, times and friends in and around Vancouver…

Sometimes the most amazing parts of our lives are born out of some of the worst parts of our lives.

“I hate to see you cry,
Lying there in that position.
There’s things you need to hear,
So turn off your tears and listen.”

Many weeks ago, in a search to find the right dog to call my own, I came across one dog’s profile. While I looked at countless profiles of dogs in foster care and shelters all across the Province, there was one little face attached to a happy name that I just couldn’t shake.

I’d visit Jordy’s profile over and over again to the point I practically had his information memorized. His tiny face was burned into my memory and his photo’s been saved in my cell phone for almost a month now. I knew at the time that I was weeks away from moving into my dog-friendly apartment, but I decided that I had nothing to lose, so I e-mailed his foster care organization for an application form.

A few days later, the form arrived in my e-mail inbox but with a cautionary message that a handful of others had already applied for Jordy and were currently in the screening process. I didn’t allow that to discourage me, and instead filled out all ten pages.

“You know it’s nothing new,
Bad news never had good timing.
Then the circle of your friends,
Will defend the silver lining.”

Despite every sucker-punch 2009 has knocked me down with, I knew that there was something about my attempted adoption of Jordy that encouraged me to keep going. With tons of support from loved ones and friends, I started the hoop-jumping process. Before long, I found out that all the others who had applied to adopt Jordy had been turned down. After phone interviews, reference checks and a personal home visit, I was finally allowed to meet Jordy this afternoon. My application had been approved, and the ball was now in my court, so to speak.

As I got behind the wheel in today’s beautiful sunshine, with Sarah McLachlan making the trip to Duncan nostalgic, I set out for Jordy’s foster home. My stomach was mixed with nervous anticipation and excitement. I wasn’t sure how Jordy would react and was secretly worried that after all I’d gone through in the application process that Jordy wouldn’t take to me.

“Pain throws your heart to the ground,
Love turns the whole thing around.
No, it won’t all go the way, it should,
But I know the heart of life is good.”

What happened this afternoon surprised everyone… me, Jordy and even his foster mom. For a dog who is normally so fixated on his “person,” Jordy and I were drawn to each other within moments. He was affectionate, cuddly, kissy and loving. The three of us took one of the other foster dogs for a walk in the woods, but before long, Jordy was instead sticking directly at my side, glancing up every 15-20 seconds to make sure I was still close by. And suddenly, he stopped and reached up to be picked up by me. His foster mom called the moment “amazing” as sunlight literally cut between the trees and onto Jordy and I as I held his little body in my arms. He chose me; I chose him.

Next Sunday, April 19th, I will be bringing Jordy back to Vancouver and into his forever home. The love I feel for this little monkey is so unlike anything I’ve felt before. His photos don’t even remotely do him any sort of justice, and what I found in Jordy was a million times more amazing than I could have ever expected.

I can’t imagine my life being in any other place than right here and now.

One day, boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl; girl falls in love with boy. All is blissful.

In this case, boy and girl get pregnant and on April 3, 2009, girl has baby girl.

I’m thrilled and elated and overjoyed to introduce you all to Sienna Lynn. She’s bright and alert, 7 lbs.-4 oz. and already the apple of her father’s eye.

It’s almost strange to me to hear the way my brother speaks about her. The same little bugger that terrorized me as a child with his fart jokes and cheeky talk-back is now calling his daughter “so beautiful” and can’t begin to fathom that he helped create this little girl.

He told me that he spoke to her every night before bed while she was still in the womb: “Hi, Sienna-bear… it’s your daddy,” he’d say. Yesterday, Trevor told me that he said the same thing to her as she laid by her mother and that she opened her eyes and looked towards him. It’s amazing to me.

I am beyond happy for my brother and Laura who will, no doubt, make fantastic parents. They will be moving back to Vancouver Island in June, and I can hardly wait to have them close to me again. A huge congratulations to them both – I am ecstatic about the expansion of what has always been a small, tight-knit family.

Welcome to the world, Sienna.