Posted on May 27, 2009
“WHY DON’T YOU LICK IT?”
That’s what Tania asked after all was said and done.
Blame it on my insatiable desire for season three of Oz. I burned through the remaining episodes of season two last night and asked Tania if she wanted to quickly hit up Future Shop. After a stop there and at IGA for a few groceries, we made our way home.
I have a habit of yanking my keys out of my purse a block or two from home, though always careful to hook the ring around a finger or two. I guard my keys with my life – they’re my only set and a key fob replacement is $100.
Rounding the corner at Richards and Seymour, what I never guessed would happen happened.
Photo: Ctd 2005 on Flickr
It was as slow as slow motion can be. I felt the key ring gently slip off my right index finger and watched as gravity sucked my keys towards the ground and in between the cold steel bars of a storm drain.
“Oh my god – what do I do? What do I do?” was all I could exclaim. It’s fuzzy now but I’m sure some expletives leaked out too. My first instinct was to hunker down, grab the bars and pull. No go – welded shut. The keys were only swimming in a few inches of water about two feet below street level but there was no way to get into the grate.
A few people that passed by suggested flagging a cop or calling the City of Vancouver. Tania tried to reassure me that we could easily have building security give me a new fob, but there was no way I was leaving the access to my whole life on the side of the street.
I thought “no way!” to myself and squatted down again, grabbed the bars and pulled. With some sort of superhuman strength, the grate budged and I gleefully yelled at Tania to help me. We lifted it off, put the grate to the side and I didn’t waste a second laying my body down on the curb to reach down. My fingers searched the murky water, grabbed the keys and hopped up. Thankfully, a young man nearby offered to replace the grate lid for us.
And so, only minutes after I nearly melt right down, we were on our way home once again. Extending them an arms-length in front of me, I asked Tania if she wanted to smell the keys. She didn’t.