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What am I supposed to say about this movie without completely ruining it for you? As soon as I first heard that another Jackass movie was soon to arrive in theatres, I was instantly excited. Without a doubt I knew I’d be there within opening week. The first movie in the series, as well as the tv show, was not without its charm. The show’s spin-offs, Viva La Bam and Wildboyz, were also something not to be missed. I had to admit, however, that the first movie left me a tad bored in parts.

I cannot say the same for Jackass: Number Two. Anyone that thinks they’re above finding this show and its concept funny is someone I don’t even have time for.

There was not a single scene nor skit in the movie that did not send me into a fit of giggles and out-loud laughter. This movie was able to make me cringe; it make my body literally recoil in ways that no Jackass skit had ever before accomplished. And unlike any time before this, there were a handful of times during this movie that I actually dry-heaved to the point that I was convinced I’d refill my popcorn bag with regurgitation.

There was no plot, there was no acting. This movie made no sense. Bam Margera cried like a little girl. April Margera screamed her famous mom scream. Johnny Knoxville laughed his obnoxious, but seductive, laugh. Steve-O managed to push his own boundaries further than I’d ever before seen. Chris Pontius’ newly toned (and smokin’) body brought back new love for man-thongs. I can go on and on, but I won’t. Just go see this damn movie.

You’re listening to: “Flesh Into Gear” by CKY from the album Infiltrate-Destroy-Rebuild

Magnificent, isn’t she? Sheryl Crow is a woman to be admired. I promised on Friday night that I’d explain my reasoning behind that, and so here it is. Before I saw her live, my feelings for Sheryl were always neutral. I could sing along to her songs on the radio but I’d never picked up one of her records. Needless to say, as I’ve already said, the performance she executed was flawless and left nothing else to be desired.

I believe Ms. Crow is the kind of woman that should be a role model to young girls, and to women in my age group. She should be considered a role model to all women really. I’m not saying she’s perfect, but she has reason to be looked up to. When too many girls these days are too hung up on who’s flocking the latest concoction from Carl’s Jr. or who’s sporting which Louis Vuitton bag, Sheryl is the kind of girl who is actually comfortable in her own skin and doesn’t need to pull any stunts to prove herself as such. Here is a woman who has battled depression, battled breast cancer, battled heartbreak and heartache and still takes care of herself. At 45 she’s on top of her own world. Not to say she doesn’t still face her struggles, but if I can project such a strong image at 45, I’d be pretty happy with myself. She’s free, single, seemingly happy and takes care of herself. Not to mention, she’s got a pretty awesome body to boot. Tell me why it isn’t women like her that are the prominent role models today?

I admire Sheryl for her optimism. I admire Sheryl for her realism. Her music today reflects the issues that affect her deeply, whether positive or negative. I suddenly find myself encouraged and inspired by this woman.

You’re listening to: “Everyday Is A Winding Road” by Sheryl Crow from the album Everyday Is A Winding Road

It’s 2:19 a.m. so, needless to say, I’m rather in need of sleep. Why am I not sleeping, you ask? Because I’m still on too much of a high from this evening, and no I wasn’t inhaling any second-hand reefer. Nor any first-hand. Tonight was a night that, to be honest, I wasn’t much looking forward to. Not that seeing John Mayer and Sheryl Crow live wasn’t going to be good - I was sure it would be great. But truthfully, the idea of such never really sunk in until I took my seat at the Pacific Coliseum.

This double bill worked out perfectly for Andrew and I. He tagged along and sat through John Mayer; I tagged along and sat through Sheryl Crow. At least, that’s what I thought I’d have to do. John is by far a phenomenal and accomplished guitarist. His blues blow me away. Hearing some of my favourite songs live was truly a treat, but “Vultures” live was better than any of the other tracks he played.

In the end, however, I have to admit with 100% shame and embarrassment (and surprise!) that I enjoyed Sheryl’s show much, much more. It isn’t that John isn’t an amazing songwriter and musician - he is. But Sheryl had more energy, more stage presence and she was better able to connect with the audience. Simply put, she puts on an amazing rock show. Plus, I can’t leave out the fact that whatever pants she was wearing made her ass look amazing. I couldn’t stop staring from the minute she walked out on stage. If you want to see pics, hit up my Flickr page.

Tomorrow (if I get the chance) I’ll tell all you kiddies about why I now admire Sheryl Crow as much as I do. And I’m not just talking buttocks. And how did things go with John Mayer after the show, you ask? Well, let’s just say I got back downtown in a limosuine and leave it at that.

Tonight I leave you with the following video that, well, just makes me smile.

Some guys shot this skateboard video and edited the boards out. Watching them grind rails is pretty sweet. Check it out…

(You might have to turn the volume up in the play screen)

I’ve noticed that a lot of my posts have become cynical and jaded. True, I have become cynical and jaded but it’s obviously an unhealthy place to be. It’s also true that sharing my problems, issues and circumstances with anyone reading isn’t always the best idea. Some things are better left unsaid. So, instead of putting any focus on things that are a detriment to me, this post is purposed in focusing on all the things in my life that I have to be grateful for. I suppose I could be posting this at Thanksgiving but then it wouldn’t necessarily be out of sincerity.

These are the good things in my life:

- I have an amazing mother.
- I have a wonderful aunt.
- I have a loving brother.
- I have a career that allows me independence and the ability to take care of me.
- I have friends that offer me support and care.
- I have a warm apartment to curl up in at the end of the day.
- I have a kick-ass truck to bomb around in. It’s stylish too.
- I was born in Canada. Many are not as fortunate.
- I have an earthly sister in Ashley.
- I have a great music collection that gives me joy.
- I have a “niece and nephew” that bring a smile to my face as much as their mother does.
- I have health.
- I have lunch with Brock to look forward to this week.
- I have a “date” with John Mayer on Friday. Too bad Sheryl Crow’s tagging along for the ride.
- I have food in my fridge.
- I have a life rich with experience.
- I have been to Tofino. That is something everyone needs to do at one point.
- I delight in the rain.

This list could go on and on. There is so much in life that is good and rich that to waste time dwelling on one or two negatives is too draining and, really, too pointless.

Now here’s something fun for everyone. Which one’s Keira and which one’s Gwynnie? Obvious, yes. Do I see the resemblance? Maybe sometimes. It’s flattering all the same. Ashley, do you think Darryl and Gwyneth are friends? It would be too strange if they were.

You’re listening to: “Smile” by Hanson from This Time Around (Australia and Japan releases)

For those of you that caught my last post, I have decided to remove it for personal reasons. I posted it in a moment of haste and after thinking about such things, have realized that it’s actually something very personal I’m dealing with and I don’t think it’s right that everyone should hear about the circumstances of it all.

Thanks for your concerns.

Every single time that I return to Vancouver from the Island, I feel the way that I feel right now. Sometimes it’s with more intensity, sometimes it’s more subdued. But the truth of the matter is that I feel longing, I feel irritable, I feel empty and I absolutely loathe being back in this hedonistic metropolis. The worst part of it all is that I have to come home to an empty apartment, and doing so only reminds me of what I desire.

I don’t need validation. I don’t need to feel like I have what’s called “a life.” I don’t even need someone to take care of me - I’m capable of all of that independently. But I desperately crave companionship. I need to be part of a team. I wish that there was someone on the other side of my apartment door when I come home…someone who’d put on a pot of tea for me, curl up in bed and watch a movie while the rain comes down. Maybe even take a nap together. So needless to say, unlocking 1209 does not leave me feeling fulfilled.

There is something constant and familiar and comfortable about Vancouver Island. Even the creepy, so-called “dwarf” at the Esso/A&W in Nanoose Bay (which, I might add, had his eyes lit up today so that was incredibly creepy) is a familiar sight to me. I miss my family, I miss my home and my truck, I miss the idea of what I could have on the Island with the right person. I hate that I desire that with “D” - with someone who is nowhere near the same headspace that I am in and couldn’t give a shit about me.

But this is where I am today and, at the very least, it’s honest.

You’re listening to: “Homelife” by John Mayer from Heavier Things

There’s an ancient Italian proverb that roughly translates into the following:

“It doesn’t matter who is the King or who is the pawn. What matters is that they all go back in the same box when the game is done.”

Who can disagree with that? How is one Ruler, Dictator, President or Prime Minister better or more powerful than the next? How is he or she more righteous; the reasons for battling more noble? How are the Canadian troops in Afghanistan of more valour than the Americans in Iraq? How are our troops not terrorists and the Taliban a group deemed necessary to be eliminated? I do not condone unnecessary violence, injustice or intolerance in any shape or form.

Look at these two pictures and I will ask you a question…

Which of these two children has suffered a greater loss? One has lost a loved one, one has lost their innocence. But which child am I speaking of? Stephen Harper tells us that the Canadian troops must be in the Middle East and that we must eliminate the Taliban. Engaging in battle, though a “noble” one, still makes the actions of the Canadian troops those of terrorists in their own right. Buildings are being destroyed, lives torn apart, loved ones die and the bodies pile up - triggers are pulled on both sides. We as a nation mourn when our troops are sent home in Ziploc bags, and yet the images of the carnage happening to foreigners on foreign soil cause us to simply shake our heads and agree that it’s “a shame.”

Don’t get me wrong for even a minute. I can’t generalize and I can’t say that all Canadians or Americans share this train of thought. And don’t for even a minute think that I don’t support our troops. I admire their loyalty to the duties they’ve been sworn. But I support them being home, being with their families. Why should one more child have to say goodbye to their father or mother, unsure if he or she will ever return? Why should one more child be scared to leave the house in the morning, unsure if he or she will return with all of his or her limbs?

Some may argue that our presence in the Middle East is crucial and absolutely necessary. What do you think would happen to the measures of security necessary and political unrest if every single Western civilization pulled out of Afghanistan, Iraq, Saudi Arabia and the rest of the Middle East? Yes, there are terrorist organizations that are operating against their own nations, but that is the duty of the United Nations to take care of. If you think for but a moment that the Canadian military is over there on a peacekeeping mission, wake the fuck up. Stephen Harper’s main priority is to kiss George Bush’s ass, in this author’s humble opinion. Whatever bullshit the media feeds us is just that. Over 75% of all Canadian media is owned by Canwest-Global. Canwest-Global is owned by a strictly Conservative family. When the government and media own the information, they can bend it all they want.

In posting this, I know that I risk major backlash. I won’t pretend to be thoroughly educated on the subject, but I know enough to debate. Perhaps none of this made perfect sense, but as a Canadian, I know what I voted and didn’t vote for. I know that the injustices - on both sides - that are happening on a moment-to-moment basis are absolutely unacceptable and Canadians have a God-given duty to inform and educate themselves and take a stand for what they believe in. I want to know where all of you stand on this issue - what are your thoughts and feelings?

In posting this, and thus potentially sparking a heated debate, I’d ask that if you comment, be respectful of the opinions and stances of others. We all come from different places and different backgrounds, so we’re all bound to have different opinions.

On a side note, I’d like to turn your attention to this article. It’s about time that it’s realized that body image and health is getting out of control in our society. Every little bit helps.

You’re listening to: “Alert Status Red” by Matthew Good from the album White Light Rock and Roll Review.

My friends and family make my world. Your family reminds you of where you come from and why you are the way you are. But your friends help shape what you’re to become and help you realize who you are from an objective and outside perspective. My friends have become undoubtedly precious to me as I’ve gotten older. Some are new, some date back years. Some friends I see rarely and some I see all the time. Some aren’t even pictured in this slideshow because I have no pictures of them. But rest assured…if you’ve come into my life at one point or another, you’ve made a life-changing impact on me in some way.

My friends have taught me to listen and have listened to me. My friends have shared laughter with me. My friends have cried tears with me. My friends have been silly with me. My friends have feared with me. My friends have taught me what it means to live with integrity and honesty. My friends have taught me what it means to respect. My friends have shown me how to grow in wisdom.

I love you.

P.S. Krista, don’t hate me for that picture - I have no others of you and I’d rather risk your upset at having that picture up than no picture at all.

You’re listening to “Which Will” by Nick Drake